
So as my good duck friend Ally will be journeying to Hong Kong within the next few weeks before coming to meet us in Australia, and seeing as it is also the location for which we have failed to write up about despite visiting those shores a number of weeks ago. I have therefore decided to structure this blog post in the style of a 'How to survive in...' list, I say that like they're really common, and everyone reads the one concerning the country they're about to visit, before travelling there, of course this is not the case and this is probably the first of it's kind ever written. Avant-garde.
Anyhow!
1. Do not when booking a twin, en-suite room in a hotel in the backstreets of Kowloon expect to be pleasantly surprised, with facilities or space. Do bring your own safe or you can just risking stuff being stolen (which is how we (or I) rolled). Make sure you're very comfortable being completely naked in front of the other person, with a piece of fully transparent glass separating the two of you, whilst one watches Tv/does anything and you shower. Make sure you're ready for the 7 year old in the room opposite to wake up at 6am and persistently ring your personal room doorbell for 2 hours until you come and out and scare him (good work Mr.Ross) Also definitely don't expect your room key to work or the lifts to ever come.

2. Do buy horrific rip offs of well known labels and brands. For example: my fresh new pair of Vaierns.

3. Genuinely do go to 'Trendy Mall' it is full of amazingly cool shops, with fair prices and A LOT of watch shops for some reason. Cord Shirts and 20 assorted types of Beatles t-shirt=Heaven.

4. Check out 'The Peak' it is lovely, great views and the train up is 45 degrees of pure fun. For some reason they take your picture just before you get on it, it's kind of weird, don't know what that's about, the guy who made these signs probably does
->

Don't buy a special ticket when getting on the train to get on to the viewing platform, it is probably a great view but definitely not worth the extra hk$50 or whatever it was, you can see just fine from outside the mall at the top.

5. Visit both Hong Kong park and The Botanical & Zoological Gardens of Hong Kong. Hong Kong park was super nice, plants, ponds, terrapins and scary Indian guys generally a nice break from the intense CBD. We nearly got scammed by 2 'Buddhists' who just wanted 'peace', apparently your bank details help out with their pursuit for this. The scary Indian of ambiguous religion, absolutely loved me. First by looking at my forehead he knew I was destined for great things, knew that 2 girls were in love with me but I only loved one back and also that I had a lot of money in notes on me apparently. He did a really simple trick with some paper that had a thermo-reacting invisible ink on it, so when he gave it to me with nothing on it and I held it in my fist for a few minutes and took it out with the 2 words on it that he'd lead me to say I WAS SO AMAZED. Then he said 'so you will pray everyday?' constantly till the park ranger told him to move on. So I thought he was just some religious nutter, until he then came and cornered us under the waterfall, where he gave me a special rock, showed me his religious teacher back in India, and recited a verse over and over whilst tapping me and holding his wallet open for me to put money in it, like he had just put me in some kind of trance where I was going to throw my money at him. After honestly about 3 minutes of just reciting and tapping, i told him I have no money, and despite him being adamant that I did (which I did), I managed to give him back his rock and walked off. So yeah if you come across him, he's a barrel of laughs, as in genuinely funny, but do make sure you're holding on to the zips of your bag and know where your wallet is at all times. After him go visit the bird aviary and then head to the Botanical and Zoological Gardens. If you see anything there, make sure you see the Gibbons, this fellow in particular ->

He was INCREDIBLE. He was an acrobatic genius, and a really lovely guy. We had a chat, he did some flips and then we just chilled.
6. Go to the end of Kowloon island, looking over to Hong Kong island, this is one of the best views of a city you'll get anywhere I reckon. It is amazing in the day, but it is so so cool at night, make it there for 8 o'clock to catch 'The Symphony of Lights' where the skyscraper's lights a mile away from you dance to a soundtrack play right behind you, it is pretty spectacular.

7. If you're on Kowloon and want to get over to Hong Kong, which you will. First get an octopus card, for one thing what an awesome name! Octopus card! Also very helpful for any form of transport and basically anything from getting coffee to buying clothes. Once that is acquired get the Star ferry across the water to HK island, it's the way to travel, sure the MTR is faster, but this is 20p (or if you wish to splash out and go on the top deck-24p!) and you get to go on a boat which is just tons of fun always, and you see the city a little more.

8. If you wish, travel to what is incorrectly named 'the largest escalator in the world'. Prepare yourself emotionally though. It was not one escalator, I'm telling you now. It was a sequence of reasonably long travelators and escalators placed in quick succession of each other. Be warned also once you reach the top and you nearly cry 'cause it's stopped and it was not what you thought at all and you have to use your legs again, you will have to walk all the way back down.

9. Don't try and get free wireless in HK it's impossible (except in the airport :) )
10. When getting noodles, dumplings or any foodstuff that is accompanied with a soup for it to soak in and offered the choice of normal stock soup or hot and sour soup, please oh please choose normal stock. It was genuinely the hottest, spiciest, lip burniest experience of my life. I honestly thought I might pass out a few times whilst eating it. I got a horrific rash for a few hours on my face and had a numb yet painful tongue for the rest of the night. I set myself the challenge to eat it all, but really shouldn't have, it required soy milk and vanilla wafers to be bought afterwards, which was awesome, I advise those, just don't (or do if you want a hallucinogenically outrageous spice adventure) order the hot and sour soup.
11. Find the super amazing second hand clothes shop they have in Hong Kong and Kowloon. It is literally so great, like Dirty Harry's but half the price and the clothes are 3 times as cool. Make sure you have enough room in your bag for the clothes though, that took some swift skills to avoid the one piece of hand luggage per person rules on Tiger Airways.

12. Do what you want in Hong Kong, don't listen to me, just have fun and do whatever.
(13. Go to Macau... To be continued in next Blog Post)
Love Love Love
Sisi
x